"We Are Family"

Milwaukee Public School's new Human Growth and Development curriculum for Grades K-5 is an eye-opener. I had never seen "family" defined as "two or more people who care for each other", especially to five year olds. These kindergarteners then get to describe their family--how many grandparents, how many aunts and uncles, how many brothers and sisters, how many cousin. Missing was the category of "parents".

I checked online dictionaries and did find that the definition of "family" still uses terms like "one or two parents and their children", "spouse and children", "persons related closely by blood", "descendents of a common progenitor". At Dictionary.com, the 10th definition came close to the MPS definition: "two or more people who share common attitutes, interests or goals and frequently live together". The provided example of this "family" was a hippie commune in the 60s.

So why would MPS decide not to use a more conventional definition of family? I am sure there was some immediate concern for the many children who do not have traditional families, except it only seems to apply to their parentage. The teaching is definitely aimed at family diversity which lets words like marriage, parents, spouses, Mommy, Daddy fall by the wayside. So is diversity okay as long as the mom, dad and kids version is never mentioned?

So we teach 5 year olds, reinforcing the lesson each year, that "caring for each other" solely defines family. That is emphasized with a Chore Chart so the kindergartener can "care" for his family. What happened to love, family lineage, safety, stability, child-rearing, etc.?

Are the pimp and his "girls" a family? Is a cult a family? Are the people in a hospital or office a family? Is a school community a family? Is a football team a family? Perhaps the waters got muddied when the word "family" was applied to each such as the Manson Family, the Marquette High family, the Kohls Store family, the Packers Family. While its great to feel special with caring people, these aren't real families, even if at some point they are substitutes.

So what should schools reinforce--the local norm, the trendy or the traditional version of family?
In my opinion, school have a responsibility to the individual child and to society. Right now, every shred of research indicates children, adults and society benefit most from the married parent family. So what sense is it to not at least give it some mention? Maybe children might even want to consider that option for their future!

I worry when education decides to play by their own rules to change dynamics in society. But then, I'm one of those nut cases that crossed out "Guardian" in "Parent/Guardian" on forms. It wasn't disrespectful of those wonderful people who raise another person's child but in respect for the role I had in my children's lives.